*Note about this post. This originally was written on 8/14/17. Time has gone so quickly in some ways. We're now enjoying our first home but it's so good to remember what we've walked through.
Life in a trailer...
Over a year ago we discovered we would need to leave the home we loved.
It was only our second rental in ten years of marriage. It has been the home we brought all three of our babies home to, hosted countless celebrations, and created endless memories in.
We discovered we would need to move on because the ten acres we've been enjoying for almost nine years would be sold and developed.
Rental prices in Portland, OR are getting ridiculous. And it was frustrating to think of renting something for so much money when a mortgage for the same price could buy us a house.
We house hunted and put in some offers. Even though we have a steady income and no debt (that's right, no car payment, student loans or credit cards) we still kept experiencing buyers who were willing to pay more than asking, with cash.
An opportunity arose for us to move in with my maternal grandmother and assist her in her home so she could live there in her final days (she's ninety-nine-years-old in September) and we in turn could have somewhere to go for the time being.
We committed to the move. We sold a lot of our times, and gave even more of them away, we cleaned and scrubbed and organized and painted away the main rooms of forty years worth of stuff, dust, and expired food (we spent fifteen hours alone on the kitchen!)
We planned on living in the home for at least two years.
My father runs a business out of the home as well and is present three to four days a week.
We moved in at the end of April and things turned sour very, very, quickly.
There was verbal abuse from my parents, lack of support in care for my Grandmother, and overall became a very toxic environment. We deemed it unsafe for all of us, but especially our three, young children.
Because people from our church chose to love us, they packed us up (literally pulled things from cupboards, wrapped them and labeled boxes) and got us out in TWO days!
We secured a storage unit, and an 80s travel trailer that is 29 feet long. It was completely mouse-ridden, the toilet leaked (clean, but still...ewwww) water on the brown, shag carpet, and we've had intermittent working water from day one.
We have felt nothing but love and support from our friends and those family members who are not toxic people.
Even in the midst of our emergency evacuation, and with how many tears I cried because cleaning the trailer and putting my babies into an unclean environment felt so overwhelming, I never once regretted our decision to get out.
As my wise husband stated, "This trailer represents freedom and peace."
And it really does.
Even though it's hard, it's good. Even though I struggle daily to feel like my children and I have a routine (we don't) I would rather be in the dirt, and 29 feet of cramped space than a large home where I jump every time I hear a door open, and I start praying it's not a family member walking over my boundaries and into my space to verbally assault me.
This is also a season, its temporary. There were no places in Portland who could accommodate a family of five for thirty days for under $6,000, trust me, I looked.
If anyone told me a year ago that this is where I would be, I never would have believed them.
Through this season of hardship (we want to forget so many things about this year)
God keeps reminding me, "You are not alone, and you are loved".
People who know nothing of the details of our situation have been texting and messaging me asking what's going on, because they've been prompted to pray!
I have Bible verses that seem to speak only to me, and I absorb them until they are beating within my chest.
There are so many details and stories that go along with our journey right now, but if you pray to God...keep praying.
If you're also struggling, please know, "You are not alone, and you are loved".
